The Time I Wasn’t Kidnapped

I was just talking to my roommate (Hi, Mom!) about Stranger Danger (note to self: Add “Stranger Danger” to list of possible band names) and how she prepared her children to keep an eye out for Bad Strangers.

My brothers are several years older than me, so I don’t really know their experiences with strangers, how they knew when someone was out to get them, or when someone was just being friendly.

Actually, I have heard stories, but this blog is all about Continue reading “The Time I Wasn’t Kidnapped”

What’s in Your Bag?

Before I begin, I really don’t think this post has to be gender-specific, which is why I called this “What’s in Your Bag” and not “What’s in Your Purse” or “What’s in Your Murse.”

I have puh-lenty of male friends who carry messenger bags, laptop bags, recyclable grocery bags, and bags shaped like puppies.

Ok. I’m lying about the last one. But how badly does your inner 8-year-old want one?

I’m not even sure this is limited to bags. I think what I’m about to discuss has pertained to my desk drawers at work and certainly to That One Junk Drawer I know we all have, so don’t pretend your home doesn’t have one. Sometimes, you just have to toss a bobby pin in the Junk Drawer in case a situation arises and you need it in that room.

But today, we are gathered here to talk about what the dickens ends up in my purse and why. Continue reading “What’s in Your Bag?”


Whoa, whoa, whoa.

My pretties. I owe you an apology. I have not gifted you with my words for months. I do not know what came over me. I will remind you, though, that I began this blog by setting myself up for failure to stick to a schedule. You were to expect that I would not regularly update.

I now have 55 minutes left in 2016 in Central Standard Time. Let us see if I can squeeze in one more post for the year.

I shall go with The Predictable and write a New Years Eve post.

I remember celebrating the year 2000. I worked at Walgreens and everyone was preparing for Y2K, which just translates to Year 2000. But it was said in a way that meant that life as we knew it was going to end. Computers were expected to stop and for reasons that I never understood, this meant that the world was going to stop. One customer told me that even cars were Continue reading “Y2Okay”

Olden Days Were Golden Days For Rebellion

If I’m really going to put it all out there, I’m not particularly rebellious. I don’t smoke, I rarely drink alcohol, I don’t like walking on streets without sidewalks because my only choices are to walk on stranger’s lawns and possibly disrupt their precious blades of grass, or walk on the street and you’re not supposed to do that.

But then, I realized that in the eyes of Youths, maybe I kind of am a rebel. So many things have changed since I was a Youth, that I can’t even keep up.

First of all, I got to sit in the front seat when I was a kid. It was rare, because my brothers developed nonsensical rules Continue reading “Olden Days Were Golden Days For Rebellion”

Why My First Fish Was My Last

When I talked about my fear of getting locked in bathroom stalls in “There’s Nothing To Fear,But Maybe This,” I felt a little validated. Maybe I’m not an over thinker. I actually learned that other people have that fear and wonder if others might share my other legitimate fears.

Such as pet fish.

We had a pet goldfish when I was roundabouts 9 or 10. It was orange-ish, going against the gold name given to it, with a black splotch on its tiny cheek that was shaped like Mickey Mouse. An MM fanatic, I named the fish Mickey and had grand plans for us. It liked swimming, I loved swimming, so we had a lot to talk about. It liked Mickey Mouse so much that it had that birthmark or tattoo in the shape of the mouse’s head. I loved Mickey Continue reading “Why My First Fish Was My Last”

What If The Hokey Pokey Is What It’s All About

(Or Hokey Cokey)

(Or Hokey Tokey)

My roommate (Hi Mom!) has a sign that says this, and my answer?

That is just fine, because one of my biggest life accomplishments involves the hokey pokey. Thank cheeses (<~~ You might have to say that aloud to understand why that’s my saying).

You are looking at reading the work of someone who was involved in breaking the record for the world’s largest Hokey Pokey Dance. When I checked this just now, I was briefly disheartened, because a group of people claimed that the Guinness Book of World Records said that they broke the record after I participated in the dance, but apparently their category was the largest line dance. So my achievement still remains. When I assisted in breaking this record in 2010, we had 7,384 participants. Continue reading “What If The Hokey Pokey Is What It’s All About”

Fast Facts Friday

I’ve considered calling this “Fun Facts Friday,” but when I’ve worked in marketing and when I read marketing materials, I don’t like when adjectives like “fun,” “awesome,” “super-neato” are used. When I see words like that used, I huff and think, “Really? Fun grapes? I’ll be the judge of that. I’LL tell you if they’re fun.”

So for now, I want to stick with my alliteration and lie that these facts come quickly/are fast to read.

1. I’m too lazy to properly do my hair, so I almost always wear a topknot. I rarely even look at my hair when it’s down, so for all I know, it could be all the way down to my rump.

The only problem when I do my topknot right is that I shut it in the car door a few times a month. It was kind of scary the first time. I felt like everyone who walked by noticed, because I struggled to find the door handle to set myself free. Now, it’s just like, “Really, Megs? Again?” And I sigh while my hands reach for the handle. By now, it’s easy to locate the handle and free myself. Continue reading “Fast Facts Friday”